Use me
by katerinaaqu
Summary: The God of Calamity Yato (Yaboku) has finished yet another slaughter and retires for the night into a deserted hut. He is tired and depressed by an unknown feeling. His only companion is his Nora and she is more coldness than comfort. However Nora wants to let him use her in any way possible. Rate M to be sure (for sexual imply mostly). Please review.


_**Mon zen no kozou, narawanu kyou wo yomu...**_

 _An Apprentice near a temple will recite the scriptures untaught_

 _(The environment makes our characters)_

The sun was softly setting behind the grass-coated mountains, however still yielding its whitish-yellow color. The clouds were few and lazy during their non-stop travel in the still blue skies, observing down at the World of the Living, not caring what is happening in it though, following their path, continuing their trip without touching the ground even once, not even at the times when the fog would be covering the rice fields like a white, transparent curtain. However the sun does touch it. The sun could never be ignorant of people's problems. And this time wasn't an exception. The sun's dying rays gently caressed the remains of a battlefield.

The swords were still planted to the ground, with the last shine of glory they held a few moments ago. Some of them were broken, some others were in one-piece and some others were simply lieing to the ground. Many of them had still the fingers of a hand closed tightly around their handles. Some of them were good and new and some others rusty, some of them were made of good material, some others not. However almost all of them had something in common; almost all of them were covered in blood. The corpses lay everywhere, empty sacks of flesh that used to contain the flaming spirits of brave men. Now their glory was long gone within a sea of grass, dirt and blood. Torn flags and remains of clothing were moving softly with the evening breeze, waving their last goodbye to the setting sun, which had witnessed everything.

The night chill had slowly started to come as the darkness of the night started coming closer and closer and the last animals of the day would start getting to their nests to retire for the night. Only a couple of craws would fly down to the quieted battlefield to feast upon the dead, to complete the circle of life, not even bothering to think of the noble souls traveling now towards the Underworld and the lands in which no living human foot was ever set to. As the darkness kept on coming and coming, extending its large wings over the World of the Living and the warmth would give its place to chill, still the faint grayish-blue sky was hovering over as if wishing to stick around a little longer…

At this time of hour, the hour between dusk and night, there was a small hut, hidden somewhere in the forest, in a path no one would notice if they wouldn't search for it. The path was rocky and dusty, not appearing being used by no one for some time now. However right now the sole traveler was slowly walking the slightly uphill path, his straw joori stepping over the small stones. Behind him he was dragging something along with him. The wound of metal being dragged along onto the dusty ground seemed to be making a strange music along with the straw flip-flop-like shoes and the heavy breathing of their owner. The man was bare-foot, dressed in a common, dark-colored male kimono open enough to reveal most of his bare chest and part of his stomach. His hair was dark bluish-black and short, tied up in a small ponytail to keep them off the way. He was slightly dirtied with blood and dirt.

His only possessions appeared to be the clothes he was wearing and a wooden-handled, sheath less katana sword. This sword was also the source of the dragging metallic sound. The man's crystal-blue eyes were dull, soulless and tired, full of sadness and his breathing was coming out heavy out of his mouth as he was walking non-stop as though his legs were moving on their own, ignoring the fatigue his soul had. The clouds gathered more and became heavier and grayer. Soon the rumble of a distant thunder followed and soon the soft "tip-tap" of the first raindrops started, increasing by any passing moment.

The small hut had as a background the gray, cloudy and rainy sky and the trees around. Outside it, some meters away appeared a small shrine for the passing by people to light some candle. Especially at these wild times of war and blood, these small huts were sometimes treated as shrines from common people who had nowhere else to run for shelter or for sanctuary. Outside the downpour had started…

* * *

The man slowly opened the door and entered almost soundlessly but the same tiredly. No sooner had he entered the hut and felt its safety of its half-dark he slowly leaned against the wooden wall and slipped down against it till fully seated to the dusty floor, with a tired sigh of relief. He remained like this for a couple of seconds with his head lowered, bangs shadowing his face.

"Revert, Hiiro…" he whispered the order completely soullessly, being a mechanical thing to do

Nevertheless the lack of warmth in his voice, the katana in his hand glowed in a white light and in a blink of an eye disappeared. The man sighed.

"We did a good job today, Yato" a soft, girly voice was heard next to him, slow, emotionless

Right next to him now was a young girl. She was small with fair complexion, almost deadly pale, dressed in white and red. Her kimono was white and the under-kimono was red. The kimono was folded right side up, a way suited only for the dead. Her obi was also red and tied in a bow behind her back. Around her small head she wore a tankan, the triangle-shaped headband of the dead. She completed her appearance with white tabi shocks and she wore joori to her feet. She wore her raven-black hair short with perfectly cut bangs. Her eyes were a pair of dull glass, dark purple orbs. Her lips appeared to have frozen on them a barely noticeable smile. She didn't differ from those made porcelain dolls.

The man didn't reply to her. His silence didn't break by her compliment. It had become a routine to hear her say this phrase. All morning he would hear desperate screams and at nights he would here her emotionless voice. The rumbling of the downpour outside was the only thing that was proving this world wasn't soundless. The girl titled her head to the side looking at him with her glass-like eyes.

"Are you feeling unwell, Yato?"

"Cut it out, Hiiro" the man whispered in his deep voice almost desperately, "I just need to rest!"

"Oh, is that so…?" the girl dragged her voice once more.

She half-kneeled in front of him, looking at him carefully.

"Why so depressed?" questioned again, "You won today. We fought well. We are a good team…"

Yato looked up at her. His eyes looked like two small moons at the half-dark, half-glowing with a hauntingly beautiful blue light.

"What reason do I have to be happy, Hiiro?" he questioned back tiredly, "For one more day we spread death over the people of Near Shore. I dunno if I am depressed or anything, but I hardly call this a reason to celebrate."

"You did your job well like you were requested" the girl insisted, "You made a person happy"

"I am a God of Calamity. I don't really believe my purpose is to make people happy, Hiiro"

"You are a god that fulfills requests. The man asked for your help and you offered it to him. Now his soul can rest in peace knowing that his enemy is dead and that his enemy's army has followed him to the Underworld"

The man's fist clenched to the hut's dusty floor.

"So this is the way to put it, huh?" he said, his tired voice dripping with irony

"This is the way it is"

"Stop twisting the meanings, Nora!" the Stray God mumbled, throwing the word almost like an insult

The girl's eyebrows barely moved as if intending to frown into an angry expression but they did not know the way.

"Do not call me like this. I hate hearing it coming from your lips" she said softly, not sounding insulted at all.

"Why not? That's what you are, aren't you?" said he, looking up in her eyes

"Remember who made me one" the girl retorted emotionlessly

Yato, the God of Calamity lowered his eyes, breaking his gaze off from hers, not finding any answer to that, not being able to add anything. He sighed and leaned his head back against the wooden wall of the hut with a sigh, his eyes fixing upon the straw roof.

"Just be quiet for a little" he said dryly, "I am too tired. I want to rest"

The tiredness didn't come from his body. He might have been fighting half the day but the body of a god wouldn't tire so easily. What truly seemed to tire him was a huge burden on his shoulders and chest. He felt something crushing him for some reason. When he was outside he couldn't show it. During the past years he used to show it to his Regalia, his Sacred Weapon but this had become dull with the years too. He no longer felt the need to express his feelings to his partner. It was as if this too had become meaningless like tasteless food you do not want to eat for yet another day.

"Okay" she said and sat beside him

* * *

The downpour was coming down pretty hard and occasionally some lightning bolt would flash into the outside darkness. Yato and his Nora, his Stray, his (and not only his) Regalia were still sitting silent. His stomach slightly growled. It has been around a week since the last time he ate something proper. When was the last time again? Six, seven days ago; when that girl gave him four nigiri as an offering? As a god of course he couldn't famish to death but he mostly depended on what people offered to him, what residents of Near Shore gave as offerings. His stomach still craved for food when he could have it. But who would actually think of making offerings to a god that didn't even have his own shrine?

"You know…" he finally broke the silence himself, "I don't know if this is the right thing anymore…what we do…"

The little Nora looked at him with her glass eyes.

"Why? You fulfill the purpose you exist for. You get paid to hear people's wishes"

"Wishes of death and wishes of destruction!" Yato whispered bitterly

Images still flashed through his mind. Slaying humans had become a habit to him. Slaying Phantoms was something he did ever since he was a kid, however slaying other gods or other gods' Regalias was a completely different story. It could be considered a taboo even among gods in a way. There should be a really serious reason for such a slaughter to happen. Recently he had done one. He still remembered slaying an entire clan of them before the goddess' bare eyes. The only thing he could do after that was to run away. He couldn't deal with her teary, violet eyes.

Hiiro, the girl he accepted as his Regalia by giving her a Posthumous Name was a Nora, a Stray. Sometimes gods used Nora to make tasks they couldn't do with regular Regalia but Yato was one of the few ones that used one on daily basis. Nora moved away from the wall.

"It is a job someone has to do, it is a task no one else dares to do… We live in dark times…"

She, once more, kneeled in front of him. Suddenly her voice became a whisper. Her two, cold, porcelain hands cupped both of his cheeks making him look up at her.

"But I…" her face was now inches apart from his, "I will protect you"

Her lips sealed his with a kiss. Yato gasped against her lips and his eyes widened in surprise. He hadn't seen that coming and he didn't have time to stop her. He didn't respond to her kiss, despite the massage her lips were doing on his, cold and smooth like porcelain. He was aware of her feelings for him. They had done this many times till now but Yato just couldn't bring himself to return those feelings. He couldn't despite the fact Nora had told him she didn't mind him "using her" that way too.

Nora pulled back from the kiss but her lips moved their way down his neck, placing small, butterfly kisses against his throat. They felt like cold, wet droplets of rain against his skin. He shuddered at the sensation of coldness.

"Stop it, Hiiro…" he whispered but his arms didn't move to push her away. It was as if he was completely dried out of energy to make the slightest move to stop her.

He tensed feeling Nora's small tongue touching his throat and chest after that.

"Why?" she questioned looking up and straight into his eyes, "You are depressed. I am here to help you"

She softly smiled to him. She always smiled. Nothing seemed able to disturb her. Nothing seemed able to scare her. Nothing could ever anger her.

"Use me" she said softly, "It's okay to use me that way. We both know what death truly means. We both heard the cries and the screams. We smelt the blood and heard the bones cracking… We fought and we killed…"

Yato was looking at her motionless and speechless.

 _"That's right…"_ he thought, _"I am a God of Calamity, a stray god with no shrine and a Nora-user…but still…"_

Her lips sealed his again and this time his eyes closed with hers feeling her tongue invading his mouth.

 _"…Gods are not supposed to make mistakes… Everything they do is for the best…"_

The material softly slipped of Nora's shoulders to reveal her small, naked breasts.

 _"…But what is the feeling of burden that is falling upon me all the time, all the more these days…?"_

Nora parted her lips from his, with a small strand of saliva connecting their mouths for a brief second and she then moved her kisses lower and her head found itself between his legs. Yako tensed clenching his teeth once.

 _"…It is like this is not what I am supposed to do… I want to build a shrine. I want to be a great god… No one wants to truly worship a Calamity God…"_

He was biting his bottom lip as Nora was moving her head up and down.

 _"But Hiiro is actually setting me astray of my purpose… It is like she lives only for the moment…she never truly believed in my dream… No, worse…she never thought of it as important in the first place…"_

Nora had now her legs at either side of him, moving up and down onto him, while Yato was breathing heavily with his head leaning back. She was cold. Everything of her seemed cold to him.

 _"This is all she cares for…? She never Stung me once, she never loses control of her feelings but this…"_

He sighed leaning his head back once more at a particular move he felt.

 _"I don't want this… I am not supposed to do this. I am supposed to be searching for my dream…to be building my shrine…but yet again…I feel tired…I feel like there is no point fighting her back anymore… Perhaps…it will help to release some stress off…but then again…it is not working…not tonight…"_

The only sounds Nora was making was a calm and soft breathing. Indeed everything about her was cold, emotionless and wouldn't wake even a single spark inside him. She moved once and twice more and he gave out a last sigh and shudder before relaxing back down, breathing shallowly.

* * *

He was still awake with Nora on his chest, staring at the ceiling. Perhaps the next morning he should search for something to eat and perhaps some sake to drink. Maybe someone would give him some offerings the following day to appease his hunger. And perhaps…even…

"You must not feel bad…" her soft whisper distracted him from his thoughts

She opened her dark eyes to look at him deeply in the eyes.

"You fulfill the wishes humans make, you receive their money and accept their requests. But even if you do feel depressed, you can always use me in any way it pleases you to let go of your stress… I will always…protect you…"

Yato didn't answer. He fixed his gaze upon the ceiling again.

"Perhaps I should let go of Hiiro…and find a proper Regalia… Maybe I must let her go…"

"I will always protect you…Yaboku" she whispered.

He shuddered at the sound of his real name

"I told you not to call me that!"

She only smiled and closed her eyes…and she spoke no more for some time. Yato was remained alone in his silence once more…His eyes fell onto her close-eyed form on his chest and then back onto the ceiling once more.

"I don't care how long it takes! I will fulfill my dream! I spent my life fulfilling people's dreams! One day I will fulfill mine! I will make a shrine and I will stand to my own two feet! And I will leave a name behind! I will not be lost in oblivion!"

And his eyes closed, trying to get some sleep… And the downpour outside the dark hut was still coming down hard…

 _ **Keizoku wa chikara nari**_

 _Continuance is power/strength_

 _(Don't give up)_

* * *

 **1st of February today and this is the first devitation of the month. I just finished watching Noragami and it was such a cute and touching anime that I simply had to make a small one-shot to say to everyone to have a good month. I know it is kind of dark and depressing but forgive me. I dunno how this idea came to me...honestly!**

 **Anyway I fell in love with Yato's (Yaboku's) outfit was God of Calamity and I wanted to make a small "private moment" with his Regalia or better his Nora he named Hiiro (Hikki as a weapon). I do not know why this idea of one-sided relationship came to my mind but I thought it might be the case since Nora has showed interest in him**

 **The two phrases written in Japanese romanji, translation and meaning are in reality Japanese old sayings. I hoped you liked my idea putting them there as an opening and ending. Their have their meanings in my story. The first shows why Yato reacts this way against his Nora and the last one shows the determination he has to continue and one day fulfill his dream.**  
 **I know the one-shot is short but please forgive me...**

 **Anyway Nora and Yato belong to their rightful owners.**  
 **Enjoy**


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